Who am I (following)? - retracing the "I"

‎"We are following, we follow ourselves." -says Derrida. I am following you, who talks, meanwhile I am following me, who follows, in my act of following. Some part of me is following me as I follow the reader, this Other I address. In a lacanian-derridic sense of de-multiplication the trace-marking there could be a moment, or, the first moment, a succession of events, the ones when the "I", the reflection has born, when I started following not you, but me, who follows who always has been (following). 
"Mental illness" seems to be all about traces, loosing contact with the (trace) of "real", getting lost in the act of following, following a differant "I", say differant trace, befriending it, lost in the staring multi-meaning of what we call life experience. 

Dwelling with(in) the text

I'm trying a new way of reading at least new for me, new in my experience. I'm trying to live with the text being read. I am struggling to live on the precise momentum/movement, the edge where the text is text-in-becoming because of my reading, a guest in my house, someone else who is to be asked, listened to, made an understatement (understood) invited again, befriended. Then, may be than I'l be able to see what's written.